Great weekend and worry...

We had a great weekend, finally nice weather here. Yesterday we put together 2 Child life swing sets that 2 friends gave to us. By putting them together, it made one great big, fun swing set. It was a bit tough for Josh as he is scared for this coming week and hopes that all his efforts, to clear the area and set it up is worth it.
Also yesterday we celebrated my parents 38 year anniversary by all going out to dinner. Joel's great when we go out, he gets to try new foods. Yesterday he tried a few bits of tomato, sucked on some crusty bread and a picke...he was happy :o)

Today Josh made waffles for everyone for breakfast (again, Joel liked, LOL!) then Josh, Joel and I went to Parlee farms and visited with all the goats, sheep and chickens. No picking today so we'll have to go back later this week to pick blueberries (we did buy some all ready picked and Joel had about 6 big ones at lunch...peeled and squished). Josh and I got a frappe and Joel sucked down some water from his sippy cup. I'll have to post a pic, he was so cute bopping around on Daddy's back in his Kelty backpack carrier. After that we went to the lake, Joel had lunch and the three of us went swimming. We floated over to see my sister's in-laws 2 houses over and Joel got to swim/play with his "cousins" (that's what the girls age 5 and 3 call him. Well that and Baby Joel, LOL!)
After that he took a 3 hour nap, awoke for dinner and then we went for a boat ride.
We all had a nice day!

I unfortunately am really starting to worry. I am trying to continue to just not think about it, but I find myself saying things like oh, I can't wait to bring Joel here or do this or that with Joel and then end up saying well, I hope to... I hate that!

I am trying to treat today, Mon. Tues and Wed. like any other day until we know what occurs Wed., but with others talking about it and asking anything new it is hard. I am so thankful for everyones prayers, support and thoughts, but it is just hard. That is the only word I can find to use...HARD!

Joel is our whole world. I love that boy more and more each and every second and to even think, OMG...

I have a scared feeling in the pit of my stomach. To even imagine life without him, I can't, It just can't happen.

I keep running what our attorney told us through my head and it renews my hope, but then I think about the situation we are in and how easy it could change. I just don't know how I could handle it.
He is our son! And he just has to remain our son...PLease GOD!

Before Joel went to bed tonight I prayed with him for the first time and I pray that it is the first of many times we pray together. My sweet, amazing baby boy! GOD Bless Him and keep him safely here with us, his Mommy and Daddy who love him with all our hearts!